Happy Mother's Day

Today is Mother’s Day. That day set aside every year to say “I love you, mom”. Somehow it means so much more when the kids are grown. Why?

Because while they are busy with their lives, raising their own children, and building their own careers they take the time to say “I love you, mom” in the midst of all the business. The best thing about being a mother when your children are grown and they have children of their own is that every day is Mother’s Day.

I am separated by miles from my children but thanks to social media like Instant Messaging and Face Time I can hook up at any given time. Gone are the days when someone had to wait for a weekend day to find time to call their mom. Thank you technology! I started taking advantage of this option many years ago when I was overseas. So far from home and the children with their families were growing and changing so much it was wonderful to keep a close connection.

A connection of the heart. A connection that last for years and years. I have a neighbor. She is quite elderly. A few years ago she lost her husband but still maintains her home. But I see her children and family coming by many times to visit with their mom. That reminds how much my own children take the time to connect with me.

For me Mother’s Day is not about how much my children are thankful to me, but how much I see that we have grown closer through the years. For this Mother’s Day I want to say to my children and grandchildren, “You guys, I love you”. This year I am thankful for our connection.

http://www.instantshift.com/2011/11/03/99-excellent-examples-of-forced-perspective-photography/

Forced Photography

I steamed cauliflower, broccoli and carrots in a pot. I used about 8 cups of mixed veggies. When tender topped with a dollop of butter and sprinkled black pepper. Yum.

Steamed cauliflower, broccoli and carrots

Next in the wok I melted:

3 Tablespoons of butter

¼ cup chili flavored olive oil.

Sauteed one cup of mushrooms

1/4 cut onion

Stir Fry Veggies

When mushrooms and onions are tender then add:

1/2 cup tomatoes sliced

6 cups of yellow crooked neck squash and zucchini, stir fry until tender

1 Tablespoon minced garlic

Salt and pepper to taste.

Spicy Chili Flavored Olive Oil

This is all we had for dinner but it was so filling and tasted so good it was hard not to go back for seconds.

And speaking of trees. Proper planting is crucial. I know I keep harping on this subject but so clearly I see in my landscape poor placement. Sadly my trees have suffered from improper planting. As the second homeowners I have learned a great deal about why trees were planted. I was lucky that the previous homeowner passed on pictures of the yard as it changed over the years Creating a proper hole with a space that the roots can grow is important as well. Some of the trees have their roots bound around them. We have since learned these root bound conditions have affected the tree growth. As well as being planted evenly and straight for growth. We now have a tree that is leaning starboard so badly that it is an eyesore.

Example of tree poorly planted.

But we can not remove it because as tree huggers it is alive and so far doing fine. One rule of thumb I always keep in mind is, the faster a tree grows the shorter its life span. And here again, see what kind of native trees there around the area where I live is important.

Turf grass requires forethought. I want drought tolerance and low maintenance. Check. Every year someone is coming up with a new grass that is touted to create the most envied lawn anyone could ever want. But alas, tried and true always seems to hold true. Turf grasses each have their own level of maintenance dependent on water, how much time you want to spend and how much money you want to spend. In my landscape, I live in a rural community, so that needs to be taken into consideration. It basically means we try to tame the wilderness which, most of the time does work. So there are environmental limitations. Whatever grass is decided upon it is a good reminder to know which grasses go where. Cool season turf grass and warm season turf grass have completely different needs.

Okay so time for a check list. Does my landscape invite birds, bats and good bugs? Check! In fact there are so many birds they can be heard with the door closed. Does it promote low maintenance? Check! It did not when I first starting working it but each year it keeps getting closer to lowest maintenance. Does it keep invasive plantings out? Hmmm. Not a whole check but better than it was before! Are the trees planted correctly. NO! Not all. This has to be the saddest part of my landscape. There are too many trees, too many bushes. Too many, too many, too many!!! It is a typical situation of not having a clear vision of the long term affect. But we are working on it. What about the turf grass? Check! For where I live warm season turf grass is the answer. Centipede, Bermuda, St. Augustine, Bahia grass and Zoysia grow the best.

Now that I have mostly “check” on my list I can turn my attention to watering efficiently and what about irrigation? Stay tuned for more Smart Gardening tips.

Lake Blackshear is 8,700 acres

Imagine our delight when we lighted on Georgia Veterans State  Park sitting on Lake Blackshear’s bank. It is a stunning park. Has a golf course, hiking trails, a air museum as well as a Veterans museum. We enjoyed a quiet evening and then the next morning decided to take a walk. On the trail Lizzie and I happened upon two white tailed deer that were not afraid of us. They stood still for us until we were only 3 to 4 feet away.

Lizzie leads the way right before we met up with two white tailed deer.

After a beautiful walk we decided to load up and head off to Savannah. We were so taken with the beauty of this park we had no idea that within hours we would be stunned beyond imagination as we walked the tree lined streets of Savannah.

Live Oaks covered in Spanish Moss, by Daffin Park

We came home refreshed and ready to move to Savannah! Okay, maybe we will just be taking another vacation there.

My history itch was satisfied in Savannah. We saw the historical district as well. Then that night I got online to learn more. I read that Sherman could not destroy Savannah during the Civil War on his way to through Georgia. Why? He said it was just too beautiful! If you have never been to Savannah then I highly recommend it!

You got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you’re sittin’ at the table.
There’ll be time enough for countin’ when the dealin’s done.

Ev’ry gambler knows that the secret to survivin’
Is knowin’ what to throw away and knowing what to keep…..

When do we know that we need a break? How do we know that our job or volunteerism has reached the “burnout” stage? What can be done about it if happens to you?

First thing is to quiet the noise long enough to know that it is happening. There are tell tale signs that burnout is upon us. Fatigue and a “I don’t care about much” are good indicators. Truly work and volunteer burnout only have one difference. With volunteerism you do not see a paycheck at the end of the week that spurs you on to keep on, keeping on. But both let you know you starting to lose interest.

I found I was reaching the burnout stage when it starts affecting me physically. I get sick easier and find I lack a desire to be inspired on. I start getting a “I don’t care about much” feeling going on. Not just about the job but life in general. Usually I can soldier through that feeling but I know I am heading for deep waters when I become combative. I am not patient with working with others or tolerating the negatives. Nothing that is going on gives me a reason to be creative. It happens differently for each job or volunteer project I am involved with but always there is a end time to it.

Now here is a real kicker. I think a burnout could be prevented or worked through but so often is the case is that is easier to push the worker out of the way instead of try to save the day. It takes a good manager to see the burnout as a side effect. I have been guilty of not seeing it or knowing why a poor performance is happening in others. I had a work associate that was really pissing me off. I finally decided to just push him out the way and move on. After I did so I found out that he was dealing with a chronic illness that he wasn’t talking about. I am still living that one down.

Now it is my turn. I have personal reasons that make it difficult to keep going. Like the above reference from “The Gambler” I know it that is time to “know when to walk away”. For the good of the many. So uh, instead of cashing it all in as a all or nothing option, What about a sabbatical? Yeah, that is it. Just a period to walk away, refresh oneself and get a fresh run at things on the job or in a volunteer project. There are good reason to decide on a sabbatical and some employers actually will work with an employee. 

Redefining purpose is a good reason to take a sabbatical. To gain clarity on the job at hand to see if it still fits within the long term goals that I have set out. Some jobs are taken to a place when they no longer grow but are in maintenance mode. Which is find for the worker bee but the self starter, creator and leader needs more of a push. So yeah, getting clarity will help.

Health is another reason to redefine work goals. Life hands us all a change in aging and health. Looking at things from a fresh perspective about this change will help to see if there anything left that is worth working on. Recharging physically may be all that is needed but what if more is needed? The clarity of moving away will help.

Spending more time with your significant other or family is another reason to take a sabbatical to see if what you are doing is a good fit. Things change, maybe you and your spouse are reaching retirement age as I am with my tall guy and there are things you want to do. I have to confess that while my husband is busy on the job I have need of something to fill my days since I am not employed, I choose volunteerism. There is a fine line between having some “golden years” to have fun and be together and reaching a space where aging or health make it so there is no time for such things to be enjoyed. For example, we have been hiking and traveling more. It is the time to do this while we can.

After writing this I think I found the answers for me. It is time to step away, get some clarity and rejuvenate. Now I see that life has been dragging me back but for a good reason. “It means that it’s going to launch” into a new and exciting place.